{"id":2469,"date":"2019-04-01T18:10:38","date_gmt":"2019-04-01T18:10:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/?p=2469"},"modified":"2019-04-01T18:10:38","modified_gmt":"2019-04-01T18:10:38","slug":"cant-wait-to-be-old","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/2019\/04\/01\/cant-wait-to-be-old\/","title":{"rendered":"Can’t Wait To Be Old"},"content":{"rendered":"

Can’t Wait To Be Old<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we
\nlike to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than
\nten years old, you’re so excited about aging that you
\nthink in fractions.<\/p>\n

“How old are you?”
\n“I’m four and a half.”
\nYou’re never 36 and a half ….
\nYou’re four and a half going on 5.<\/p>\n

You get into your teens; now they can’t hold you back.
\nYou jump to the next number. “How old are you?” “I’m gonna
\nbe 16.” You could be 12, but you’re gonna be 16.
\nEventually.<\/p>\n

Then the great day of your life; you become 21. Even the
\nwords sound like a ceremony.
\nYou BECOME 21….Yes!!<\/p>\n

Then you turn 30. What happened there? Makes you sound
\nlike bad milk. He TURNED; we had to throw him out.
\nWhat’s wrong? What changed? You BECOME 21; you TURN 30.<\/p>\n

Then you’re PUSHING 40….stay over there. You REACH 50.<\/p>\n

You BECOME 21; you TURN 30; You’re PUSHING 40; you REACH
\n50; then you MAKE IT to 60.<\/p>\n

By then you’ve built up so much speed, you HIT 70.
\nAfter that, it’s a day by day thing.
\nYou HIT Wednesday…<\/p>\n

You get into your 80’s; you HIT lunch, you HIT 4:30. My
\nGrandmother won’t even buy green bananas. “Well, it’s
\nan investment, you know, and maybe a bad one.”<\/p>\n

And it doesn’t end there….<\/p>\n

Into the 90’s, you start going backwards. “I was JUST 92.”<\/p>\n

Then a strange thing happens; if you make it over 100, you
\nbecome a little kid again. “I’m 100 and a half.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Can’t Wait To Be Old Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than ten […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2469","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2469","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2469"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2469\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2470,"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2469\/revisions\/2470"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2469"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2469"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ravensplayland.com\/wpRAVEN\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2469"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}